I want to be an olympian. Is it too late? Is olympian supposed to be capitalized? So many questions... My dad once told me that I have a swimmers back. Not that it ever got me anywhere. Could it be that I fear water? Oh, and I have the height of a gymnast, not the weight... but that will come after time. So many attributes of an olympian... how did I not realize this true destiny of mine 20 years ago? Unfortunately, when I was 8, I wanted to be an opera singer.
Still working on that...
***** Ooh.. OLYMPIAN is supposed to be capitalized. I should have known. Such greatness demands CAPITALIZATION!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
What dreams may come?
I don't know if my blog is the place to do it, but I need to start jotting down some of my dreams. I guess it's my blog and I can do whatever I please, right? Feel free to skip this blog.
First dream of the week: Riding in the car with two close friends, one not as close friend? Anyway, the "not as close" friend's father had just passed away and we were heading to the funeral together. Which was being held at the movie theatre. This dream is messed up on so many levels. The driver of the car is one of my close friends and she is being completely inconsiderate, stopping at random places, taking the longest route possible, ignoring my request for her to hurry, etc... My feeling in the dream is of complete awkwardness. I feel ticked at my driving friend for being such a jerk, I am anxious because we are going to be late for the funeral, and I am uncomfortable for my "not as close" friend in the front seat... who obviously didn't have a better ride to this unfortunate event. Where is the rest of her family? Remember the other "close" friend that is with us? She is just kind of in the background in this dream, which is strange cause she isn't normally that type of person in real life. This dream doesn't end at a funeral. No, somehow we end up at an abandoned warehouse that is loaded with chinese people who make me go through a strange obstacle course. Did I mention I was watching the olympics the night before... I wake up: wondering about my friend's dad.
Second dream: Ex-flame dream. Always the best, right? In the dream I am getting back together with him, happier than ever. I don't remember a single detail about this dream other than the person, the lovey-dovey feelings, and the fact that I have had this dream before. I wake up: depressed and hating the fact that I remember my dreams.
Third dream: This is another dream that is sketchy in its detail, but the plot is a familiar one in my dream. The jist of it is that I have conversations with Mark's ex-girlfriend and that we become close friends. I wake up: feeling relaxed, hopeful, and ambitious.
I think the first dream has much more detail because it is an unfamiliar plot for me. So, it was the most mysterious and interesting to for me to "tell".
I would love to be an expert on dream interpretation. Perhaps an expert will find my blog.... That would be lovely.
First dream of the week: Riding in the car with two close friends, one not as close friend? Anyway, the "not as close" friend's father had just passed away and we were heading to the funeral together. Which was being held at the movie theatre. This dream is messed up on so many levels. The driver of the car is one of my close friends and she is being completely inconsiderate, stopping at random places, taking the longest route possible, ignoring my request for her to hurry, etc... My feeling in the dream is of complete awkwardness. I feel ticked at my driving friend for being such a jerk, I am anxious because we are going to be late for the funeral, and I am uncomfortable for my "not as close" friend in the front seat... who obviously didn't have a better ride to this unfortunate event. Where is the rest of her family? Remember the other "close" friend that is with us? She is just kind of in the background in this dream, which is strange cause she isn't normally that type of person in real life. This dream doesn't end at a funeral. No, somehow we end up at an abandoned warehouse that is loaded with chinese people who make me go through a strange obstacle course. Did I mention I was watching the olympics the night before... I wake up: wondering about my friend's dad.
Second dream: Ex-flame dream. Always the best, right? In the dream I am getting back together with him, happier than ever. I don't remember a single detail about this dream other than the person, the lovey-dovey feelings, and the fact that I have had this dream before. I wake up: depressed and hating the fact that I remember my dreams.
Third dream: This is another dream that is sketchy in its detail, but the plot is a familiar one in my dream. The jist of it is that I have conversations with Mark's ex-girlfriend and that we become close friends. I wake up: feeling relaxed, hopeful, and ambitious.
I think the first dream has much more detail because it is an unfamiliar plot for me. So, it was the most mysterious and interesting to for me to "tell".
I would love to be an expert on dream interpretation. Perhaps an expert will find my blog.... That would be lovely.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Never give up?
There are some things that we learn in life to never give up on. To never stop trying. When we were kids our parents told us that anything was possible if we set our mind to it. I have kept this mindset well into my adult life. Oh, I have had my issues remembering that I have that mindset... but it is always in the back of my mind. Kind of like my little motivational mantra to get me back on track.
Unfortunately, I have found that there are some things that no matter how hard you try, you will not achieve. As a matter of fact, sometimes the more you try, the less likely some things will happen. I mentioned in a different blog about how there will be people who don't like me, and I need to accept that. But, still, the inner twelve year old in me still exists. I am a pathetic Meredith Grey, standing in the elevator, constantly shouting "pick me,choose me, love me". Why do I constantly question whether or not certain people like me? Why do I waste my time? Why do I even care? Deep down, I know that I cannot make everyone adore me. Yet, I never stop trying...
Unfortunately, I have found that there are some things that no matter how hard you try, you will not achieve. As a matter of fact, sometimes the more you try, the less likely some things will happen. I mentioned in a different blog about how there will be people who don't like me, and I need to accept that. But, still, the inner twelve year old in me still exists. I am a pathetic Meredith Grey, standing in the elevator, constantly shouting "pick me,choose me, love me". Why do I constantly question whether or not certain people like me? Why do I waste my time? Why do I even care? Deep down, I know that I cannot make everyone adore me. Yet, I never stop trying...
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