Monday, August 24, 2009

thoughts

Maybe you read my last post and are able to sense that I am trying to build a relationship with God. Or perhaps you think that I am reading the bible out of pure boredom, which I guess could be possible. Anyway, I have been having conversations with God lately, telling him what I am looking for out of life, expressing my fears, complaining about the Cubs... you know, the usual soul searching stuff. This is all going fine, except I have a small concern. Is God hard of hearing? Or maybe really soft spoken? Either way, I am afraid I am not hearing or seeing the answers I need.

Bottom line: One of us better start speaking up. Soon.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

currently reading...

The book of all books. The Bible. I am on page 16, which is the equivalent to page 73 in a "normal" book. The comprehension of this is so-so, I'm doing better than I thought I would be. However, keeping all these people straight.. and their children... and their children... and their children. You get the point.

It is all very time consuming and my ability to speed read is not coming in handy.

Different mood...

I don't know what this means... but someone help me.

I've been watching movies on the Lifetime and Hallmark channels.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Frustration

I wish I could send a letter to Bub's housemates. They need a lesson in communication and compassion, and I am more than willing to give them that lesson.

Unfortunately, it's not my place. It's not my place. It's not my place.
Will someone please keep telling me that over and over before I overstep my boundaries?



Thanks.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Never fear

I made lasagna tonight for the second time in roughly 8 years. I'm not exaggerating either. The first time I made it obviously didn't turn out too well. I was ambitious back then, grabbing random ingredients, not so much as even glancing at a recipe. I was confident that my Italian roots alone would carry me to success. I was sadly mistaken. The result was so traumatizing that I almost had to be hypnotized to remember the outcome. The lasagna consisted of tough "more than al dente" noodles stuck together with a minuscule amount of sauce and cheese, cooked to a burnt crisp. I remember trying to chew through the first bite and tell myself that it really wasn't so bad. After a few more forced swallows I couldn't kid myself any longer and threw my lasagna and my heritage in the trash.

Lately, I had been revisiting my love of lasagna by viewing recipes online and soon I began toying with the idea of attempt numero dos. This time I researched carefully, looking for moderately easy recipes with ingredients that I could afford. I narrowed it down to a couple of recipes and decided to use them as my guide, not really following either one exactly. After shopping for my supplies at two different stores and a couple of hours of preparation, my masterpiece was finished. Now for me, cooking isn't fun unless you have someone to share it with. Luckily, I have just the hungry, (albeit picky) male for the job. Mark came over for dinner after a long hard day and had not one, but TWO massive servings and asked for some to take home as well.

SUCCESS!

Oh, I enjoyed the lasagna as well. I already have some ideas to do some minor tweaking.

My lasagna fear is now conquered.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

just words

I know I complain, but I am thankful.
I know I cry, but I am happy.
I know I yell, but I am calm.
I know I hurt, but I am strong.

I close my eyes, but I still see.
The pieces of you, the pieces of me.






I want to do more with this.. wish I could make a collage on a blog somehow.. thinking.. thinking..

I need to remember those moments I have, where I feel like no one "gets me".
I know I am not the only one. Too many times do we see what we want to see and not realize that there are so many more pieces to the puzzle. Even the silliest of people are much more deeper than we give them credit for.








"free your mind and the rest will follow"