Just a start

I've learned...

I can handle being alone.
Who my true friends are.
Everyone has a secret.
Boyscouts are the best salesmen.
My mother truly does know me best.
I am so loved.
No matter how much I fear it, aging is inevitable.
I will always be emotional.
My brother will never thank me for my wisdom.
The Chicago Cubs really might not win a world series in my lifetime.

Things I haven't....

The electric slide.
How to french braid.
All the words to the Lords Prayer.
How to stop offering my unwanted wisdom to my brother.
It's okay that not everyone wants to be my friend.
How to say goodbye.
The meaning of life.
A foreign language.
How to play poker.
What the best way to stop hiccups is.
Why I care so much.







Just a start...

Scattegories, part two.

Things I love that start with the letter B.

Blush
Buns
Bed
Books
Bubblegum
Bobby pins
Beaches
Body lotion
Bendy straws
Best friends
Blogging
Bona
Brothers
Bowling
Brownies
Babies
Breathing
Butter
Boardgames
Burgers
Boots
Blizzards (the ice cream type)
Baseball

quick

Had a date with Courtney, just the two of us. It was lovely. We ate at Mogies and drank at the Red Room. We were home by 11.Considering we left at 6 pm, we lasted quite awhile, right? We spoke of sex and other girly things. All in all, it was great. I hope we can do it again, it was nice to get out of the house and gossip.

In sad news, I got the call yesterday (Friday) that my beloved Ivory was put to sleep. She was the most well behaved and sweetest dog that we ever had. I, naturally, cried when my mom told me, but it really hasn't hit me yet. Honestly, I am kinda reluctant to go back "home" to Turtle Lake, because I know then that her absence will hit me even more so. Sigh, I would go in more depth about my precious dog but I am so tired and am afraid that I won't paint her the way she deserves. Losing pets is such a bummer.

Don't take loved ones for granted... animals or otherwise.

P.S. Courtney and Tracy... feel free to blog via my blog anytime. :) Love you both!

Choppy

I'm in a funk. Lonely and self pitying. It has to stop.
Halloween. I had a great night with my nieces and nephews and the rest of the family.
However, the second I got in my car, by myself, I felt blah.
Perhaps, I shouldn't spend any time alone, I think too much.
I ate Portillo's today. This probably means nothing to the people who read my blog. If you are curious, google it.
I finally squeezed into jeans that haven't fit me in two years. Sure, they were a little snug, but they fit... and that made me happy.
It's my grandparents (Fred's mom and dad) 50th wedding anniversary party this weekend. It blows my mind. 50 years with the same person is amazing. If I want to have a shot at being married that long, I better get married tomorrow.
I'm a jealous person. I wish I wasn't, it's not something I am proud of.
I miss my dad. I wish I had an extra 300 dollars lying around so I could fly down to Florida to see him.
This blog is so unstructured and it really bothers me. But, it resembles my thoughts right now. Choppy and random.
I think everyone should keep a diary and write in it at least once a week. I retract that. Once a month. If I were to say once a week, that would be hypocritical.
Writing this pointless blog is keeping me from the unevitable. Thinking.

Goodnight.

Scattergories

Things I like that start with the letter "A"


Amazing grace
Art
Artisan bread
Apples to Apples
American Idol
Almena
Acoustic Cafe
Afghans
Andy Rooney
Allrecipes.com


Yeah, the letter A is horrible.
Don't take offense... Andrea or Amy, or any of you A named people for that matter.

Stay tuned for more stimulating blogs...

I wrote a blog and then I deleted it.

I knew this would happen.

Just disregard my previous post. Well, maybe not all of it. Last night I reached the point that I was afraid would come. I miss him. Or I think I miss him. I don't know the difference anymore. I knew that things were too good to be true. I knew that I was handling it all just a little too well. I hate that I sound like some high-school drama queen right now. This unsure feeling sucks. In the back of my mind, I hear the reasonable voice, telling me that its not him I miss, just the idea of him.
I just want to know, or maybe deep down I do and I just can't admit it. This is the first time that I have felt genuinely upset about us.

This is probably just an off day.







I babble sometimes.